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Sunday 22 July 2012

Waste Of Timer

Finally a device as been invented that can count down from five minutes. Every golfer will at some point stray into the rough or a bush. Looking for your favourite Callaway warbird is frustrating, especially after the birdie you shot on the previous hole and this is your new lucky ball. The rules of golf state that you can only spend five minutes looking for a lost ball. With thoughts of a drop shot looming, the fear that your round will crumble, it is difficult to keep track of time. That's where 5up can help. 

5up have identified a gap in the market for golfers. They have unscrupulously noticed that there is no product on sale that can accurately record the passing of five minutes. 

5up understand that watches are busy keeping the beholder up to date of the specific time in that location that they simply cannot notify an individual of when a period of time like five minutes has lapsed. 

Log onto www.5upgolf.com to find out how you can order this helpful device. The website has a video showing how the 5up timer can change your round. This product is endorsed by Andrew Murray, a former European Open winner and a Senior Tour pro. 

In the video Andrew is playing a round with a glum and forlorn looking couple. The husband shanks his driver into the rough. Andrew places his bag and starts the timer. Andrew Murray, a current Senior Tour pro doesn't even have a stand on his bag. He has to lay it flat on the ground. There is no way I am taking advice about golf from a fella who calls himself a professional golfer yet has a bag from Sports Direct that probably cost him £5 and doesn't own a watch. 

How much does piece of kit cost? £12.99!!!!!

If anyone should purchase the 5up timer then I'm a afraid to say that you may need your head checking. If you buy this product then you are agreeing that a watch, the clock on a mobile phone and the movement of the sun are incapable of announcing the passing of time.

What's next, a piece of paper with a series of boxes on each numbered from 1 to 31, sometimes to 30 or 28. A specific box can be highlighted to indicate a day in a month when your next round of golf is. There are 12 of sheets of paper, each containing a picture of an adorable kitten or topless woman.  I call it the Golburn Golf Day Scheduler. It will revolutionise the way you plan your next round of golf. 

Contact me at golfburn1@gmail.com to order your Golburn Golf Day Scheduler today.